Forgiveness the first step in healing

Forgiveness is hard for  many of us, I'm guilty of having a hard time forgiving. Example when I was a child my favorite cousin molested me and when I was twenty one I begin to realize what he had done when I was like 3 or 4 years of age and I hated him for. He died and I was glade because he would not harm another child. My ex-wife committed adultery with my number one deacon, while I was accepting my calling into the ministry. I hated her and him and blamed God for letting this happen to me. Each case I blamed myself for the sins that were committed against me the hardest person to forgive often is ourselves, we think if I would have just done this or that perhaps I could have prevented this tragedy from befalling me.. So here is the reaility boys and girls, if our heavenly Father can forgive us, then we can, and must, forgive ourselves and those that harmed us. For you see the molested and the ex-wife have gone on with their lives I'm the one dragging around the dirty garbage bag , when Christ tells me to bring me heavy burden to him. If God can decree that we are forgive-able, but we say we are too bad to be forgiven, we are saying we know more than God. Should your standards be higher than God's standards? He forgives. Why won't you forgive yourself as well as those that hurt you?  The enemy wants us to stay focused on our past and our failures and the open wounds that we never let heal, yet Jesus wants to heal those wounds, stop thinking you can't give it to him what is greater than God???? There is no pain no sin that you may have committed or suffering that you have endured that He is not able to take away the pain and heal the wounds. Give to him what do you got to loose nothing but you got a world of joy and peace to gain by giving him your burden our pain.   Its time for forgive and let go and in return receive God's blessing. God wants you to believe His Word and focus on Him, so he give you a better future without all the pain and unforgiveness that only kills your spirit & can cause physical and mental illness. Jesus is after all the great physician, He knows your pain and what you need to finally begin the healing process..

 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. (Colossians 3:13).