EPHESIANS 5:33

 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband (Ephesians 5:33)



Tell me did you know that the Father desires to bless your spouse through you?? Did you know that ? Jesus has sent us out as members of His spiritual Body, to minister to those around us. We are supposed to allow His love to flow through us.  God loves your spouse enough to die for them, He wants the very best for them and he wants them to know and experience his true love for them but he uses us to reflect and direct that love to our spouses. So are you being the hands and feet of Christ, that way your spouse might experience Christ love for them?   Yes I know, they have flaws but so do you and they are not perfect. They need a
lot of help, just as you and I do and forgiveness and love are part of the help. That is why God sent you, as His representative, to minister to them, so how is your first ministry doing right now???  To minister means to serve. God put you where you are to serve to be a blessing. It is a mistake to think of "Christian ministry" only as being a pastor or missionary, etc, each of you husbands have a ministry to love your wives as Christ loved the church meaning you must die to self and be willing to put her needs first, but wait there is more you wives my sisters in Christ you also have a minister to honor/respect your husband. Any time a Christian is serving  others it is "Christian ministry," and you become the hands and feet of Christ and you glorify Him.
Your ministry is not limited to your spouse and your children, but it certainly must start with them. My Bishop use to tell us that he can tell which pastors he would remove from the preaching rotation and which of us he would allow to keep teaching, basically by looking at our wives to see how happy they were, since our wives were our first ministry and Bishop Johnson always if I or any of the pastor there were not being true to our first ministry how we take on additional duties when were not able to perform our first duty to love our wives. Whatever other ministry God may entrust to you, if you are married, God has trusted you with the ministry of being a blessing to your spouse, hold a bible study with your spouse, pray with your spouse and most of  all let them know that they are safe in their relationship with you and honor God buy doing this.
God has not left you to struggle in this ministry on your own. He is with you, and in you, to work through you. God will help you. But you must allow Him to do so. Building up and encouraging your spouse will also bring honor and glory to God and He is well pleased when we do this.